Hello readers! Today marks the tenth edition of Q&A we've done since this blog began! Thank you for sticking with me this long to make it interesting. Let's get to the questions.
Do rabbits count toward the annual casualty quota?
-Rodeo Nova
Hello Rodeo Nova,
While I would like very much to refuse answering your question, I am sworn to do so by the responsibility of being the Super Wizard Guidance councilor.
Or that's what I would say, if I knew. Truth be told, nobody really knows much about the casually quota other than the accountant. We're not sure why it exists or what would happen if it were to be exceeded. We assume that this has never actually occurred, because we assume that Robert Baron would tell us if we did. Usually he just tells us if we're getting close.
But as far as I know, only students count towards the annual casualty quota. That said, please keep in mind that Elder Malcolm would probably be somewhat displeased at violence against his kind, and do try not to make the turf war between you and Ninja Bunny any worse than it already is. Rabbits may not count towards the casually quota, but the students that have been caught in the crossfire do.
Dear Lazer Gaiden,
I've accidentally wandered into Elder George's office. He gave me a stern talking to about my wandering, and assigned me detention in "the west wing." Is the entrance to the west wing still a giant mouth?
Sincerely,
-Lesser Evil (and clearly not some fake trying to determine the dangers of the Tower's West Wing prior to infiltrating it.)
Hello Lesser Evil,
Nice try, but you're clearly trying to determine the dangers of the Tower's West Wing prior to infiltrating it!
Also, Elder George has apparently switched bodies with a dog for reasons that are being ignored in the interest of being hilarious, so he can't really tell anyone anything.
As far as I know, the entrance is still a mouth anyway. A number of overly curious students have been consumed by the mouth, so we've moved a Crimson Bovine vending machine in front of it to block it. Some members of the Council disagreed with this action, stating that if it consumes the Crimson Bovine, it may become powerful enough to exist. However, as of yet, it has not consumed the vending machine. So we're probably safe as far as that goes. Probably.
Seriously, stay away from the West Wing. I don't know how many times I have to say it's for your own good. This is what the Council gets for making curiosity a class for students to take.
Hello sir,
I've noticed a distressing trail of empty Crimson Bovine bottles down here in the basement. It's almost like it's leading me somewhere. Is it a good idea to follow trails of empty bottles in a room no one knows the location of?
-Throat-Punch Ballet
Hello Throat-Punch Ballet,
I would have to say no, it's probably not a good idea. But then again, what else are you going to do? Maybe you left it for yourself in the Montage. They can be weird like that.
Sir, is the Super Wizard order responsible for civilian legal fees for things like...say for example...massive loss of life, death and dismemberment, and "general terror"? On a completely and totally unrelated note, you may be hearing from some people in Dim Underchilly soon.
-Wolf Knight
...I had a number of questions of my own regarding this, but then I remembered the company you're keeping. I'm told that the Council and Tower Accountant have had a number of very urgent planning meetings for...well...that.
Sir, what's this I hear about my sister being missing?
-Turbo Thunder
Hello Turbo Thunder! Everything's fine with Taco Lightning, she's not missing in the slightest! Enjoy your family visit, and no need to worry about these missing sister rumors, and certainly not to read further in this Q&A!
Sir, help! I've been kidnapped by *Redacted*!
-Taco Lightning
Hello Taco Lightning!
I assure you that we're doing everything in our power to track you down. Hang in there!
That's odd, I don't recall there being another question for this week...
Lazer Gaiden,
If you and the Council continue to ignore our demands, I will be forced to escalate this situation. You will come to the West Wing, and we will see how much this student means to you and your order.
...I'll see you next week, readers.
Friday, January 27, 2017
Thursday, January 26, 2017
The Sacrificial Slab Bar and Grill (Part 2)
"AHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHH! OH GOD IT BURNS!" The man on the rack screamed.
"I'm going to be honest, I'm not sure my..." Wolf Knight paused, and considered a moment. "...traveling companions and I are very comfortable with this, Elder Bloodscream."
"Eh." Burning Mermaid shrugged.
"Oh, no one's here against their will, kiddo. They love this!" Elder Bloodscream said, and jammed the hot poker into the bound man's arm again.
"AHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHH! THE BURNING! AHHHHHHHHH! AHHHhhhh......" the man fell silent as the poker was pulled away, panting and gasping for breath. "Phew...Heh...good times."
"Eh?" Elder Bloodscream said, nudging Turbo Thunder with his elbow. "You want a go, sport?"
Turbo Thunder's face transitioned through several shades of pale and he managed to shake his head in a stilted way.
Burning Mermaid rolled her eyes. "Give it here." she said.
Elder Bloodscream handed the poker over to Burning Mermaid and laughed. "Don't have too much fun now, you crazy kid." he said. "As for you two, follow me and we'll see how we can help you out."
"AHHHHHHHHH!"
Wolf Knight and Turbo Thunder followed the robed man as he led them towards the gift shop.
"You see? I told you that sometimes you just need to ask for help." Wolf Knight said to Turbo, quietly. "Not everyone's as bad as you seem to think they are."
"AHHHHHHHHH! TOO MUCH!"
Turbo gaped at Wolf Knight, his jaw dropping open a little. "Wolf Knight, we watched them sacrifice someone! And...and the meat!"
"AHHHHHHHHH!! I NEED THAT SPLEEN!"
"Just showmanship, kid! We're a theme restaurant, I thought you'd figured that out by now." Elder Bloodscream said.
"AHHHHHHHHH! WHAT DID YOU DO TO TYLER?!"
"Yeah, see?" Wolf Knight said.
"If it's a theme restaurant, where did they take the bod-" Turbo started, but Wolf Knight cut him off.
"So we're just here for a blood sample from..."He pulled out the brochure and examined it a moment. "Deathlord Clarence."
"AHHHHHHHHH! I DIDN'T SIGN UP FOR THIS!"
"Ah, got the short straw, huh? Well, we've got a bunch of vials in the gift shop." Elder Bloodscream explained.
"That's a weird thing to sell in a gift shop." Wolf Knight replied.
"Kid, we're torture junkies. I assure you it's not the weirdest thing you'll find in there. We've got things you wouldn't see in your wildest dreams or your most vile nightmares. Also, funnel cake."
“Funnel cake? I haven’t had that in years. Is it any good here?” Turbo asked.
“Eh.” Elder Bloodscream shrugged.
In short order, Wolf Knight was examining a vial of ordinary looking blood and Turbo was munching on a plate of funnel cake.
“This funnel cake is really good!” Turbo said.
“You’re very kind.” Elder Bloodscream replied, beaming. “We use a special ingredient.”
“Oh yeah? What’s that?” Turbo asked.
Elder Bloodscream spread his arms wide. “HUMAN SACRIFICES!”
Turbo abruptly dropped the plate and ran in the direction of the bathrooms, holding his hand over his mouth. Elder Bloodscream let out a burst of laughter before wiping a tear from his eye with his robe. “That never gets old.”
Burning Mermaid walked over to join them, handing the poker back to Elder Bloodscream.
"Eh? Done already? Did you have fun?" he asked her.
"It's not a very good arcade." Burning Mermaid replied. "I broke it."
"You broke..." Elder Bloodscream started, staring at her and then at the poker as his brain attempted to process her response. He ran back in the direction they had come as a miserable Turbo Thunder rejoined them.
"I'm not going to ask, and I don't want you to explain." Wolf Knight said to Burning Mermaid.
"That's probably for the best." She replied with a shrug.
"We should probably leave, quickly." Turbo said. "For a number of very good, legitimate reasons."
"I'm going to be honest, I'm not sure my..." Wolf Knight paused, and considered a moment. "...traveling companions and I are very comfortable with this, Elder Bloodscream."
"Eh." Burning Mermaid shrugged.
"Oh, no one's here against their will, kiddo. They love this!" Elder Bloodscream said, and jammed the hot poker into the bound man's arm again.
"AHHHHHHHHH! AHHHHHHHHH! THE BURNING! AHHHHHHHHH! AHHHhhhh......" the man fell silent as the poker was pulled away, panting and gasping for breath. "Phew...Heh...good times."
"Eh?" Elder Bloodscream said, nudging Turbo Thunder with his elbow. "You want a go, sport?"
Turbo Thunder's face transitioned through several shades of pale and he managed to shake his head in a stilted way.
Burning Mermaid rolled her eyes. "Give it here." she said.
Elder Bloodscream handed the poker over to Burning Mermaid and laughed. "Don't have too much fun now, you crazy kid." he said. "As for you two, follow me and we'll see how we can help you out."
"AHHHHHHHHH!"
Wolf Knight and Turbo Thunder followed the robed man as he led them towards the gift shop.
"You see? I told you that sometimes you just need to ask for help." Wolf Knight said to Turbo, quietly. "Not everyone's as bad as you seem to think they are."
"AHHHHHHHHH! TOO MUCH!"
Turbo gaped at Wolf Knight, his jaw dropping open a little. "Wolf Knight, we watched them sacrifice someone! And...and the meat!"
"AHHHHHHHHH!! I NEED THAT SPLEEN!"
"Just showmanship, kid! We're a theme restaurant, I thought you'd figured that out by now." Elder Bloodscream said.
"AHHHHHHHHH! WHAT DID YOU DO TO TYLER?!"
"Yeah, see?" Wolf Knight said.
"If it's a theme restaurant, where did they take the bod-" Turbo started, but Wolf Knight cut him off.
"So we're just here for a blood sample from..."He pulled out the brochure and examined it a moment. "Deathlord Clarence."
"AHHHHHHHHH! I DIDN'T SIGN UP FOR THIS!"
"Ah, got the short straw, huh? Well, we've got a bunch of vials in the gift shop." Elder Bloodscream explained.
"That's a weird thing to sell in a gift shop." Wolf Knight replied.
"Kid, we're torture junkies. I assure you it's not the weirdest thing you'll find in there. We've got things you wouldn't see in your wildest dreams or your most vile nightmares. Also, funnel cake."
“Funnel cake? I haven’t had that in years. Is it any good here?” Turbo asked.
“Eh.” Elder Bloodscream shrugged.
In short order, Wolf Knight was examining a vial of ordinary looking blood and Turbo was munching on a plate of funnel cake.
“This funnel cake is really good!” Turbo said.
“You’re very kind.” Elder Bloodscream replied, beaming. “We use a special ingredient.”
“Oh yeah? What’s that?” Turbo asked.
Elder Bloodscream spread his arms wide. “HUMAN SACRIFICES!”
Turbo abruptly dropped the plate and ran in the direction of the bathrooms, holding his hand over his mouth. Elder Bloodscream let out a burst of laughter before wiping a tear from his eye with his robe. “That never gets old.”
Burning Mermaid walked over to join them, handing the poker back to Elder Bloodscream.
"Eh? Done already? Did you have fun?" he asked her.
"It's not a very good arcade." Burning Mermaid replied. "I broke it."
"You broke..." Elder Bloodscream started, staring at her and then at the poker as his brain attempted to process her response. He ran back in the direction they had come as a miserable Turbo Thunder rejoined them.
"I'm not going to ask, and I don't want you to explain." Wolf Knight said to Burning Mermaid.
"That's probably for the best." She replied with a shrug.
"We should probably leave, quickly." Turbo said. "For a number of very good, legitimate reasons."
Tuesday, January 24, 2017
Super Wizard Disciplines: The Eighties (Part 1)
Hello Readers! I believe it's time to discuss one of the most popular and well-known of the Super Wizard disciplines: The Eighties.
Most Super Wizard disciplines have been developed in-house and handed down for generations, but The Eighties is a bit of an exception. They were discovered when we intercepted signals of a lost time from a lost world, and have been adapted into one of the most potent (and awesome) Super Wizard disciplines at our disposal. A master of The Eighties can decimate their opponents with the power of rainbows, star wipes, and hair metal. They can also utilize the mysterious time compressing montage ability. Masters of The Eighties were also masters of the impossible, and constantly seeking to better their already impressive skills. One of the Super Wizards* from the lost world, a Stan Bush, was quoted as "I wanna run where the eagles fly." Astonishing, and an inspiration to all.
*or the lost world's equivalent to Super Wizards.
In part one regarding this discipline, we'll be taking a look at one of the basic techniques of The Eighties. Like all good things, The Eighties must be handled in small doses (or risk catastrophic consequence).
The Montage: One of the more mysterious abilities of the Eighties is that of the Montage. When channeling the power of the Eighties (in conjunction to rockin tunes of an adequate cheese factor), this ability allows the user to compress chunks of time while pursuing some sort of goal, and skip the boring or unpleasant parts. This ability is not without risks, however, as you can end up in places that you don't expect while compressing time*. Misuse (or sometimes just standard use) can cause the appearing of Eighties Spawn, and we're trying to avoid that as much as possible. Some of the make good Super Wizard candidates, but most of them don't and it's getting harder to figure out what to do with them.
*Presumably, this is how Throat-Punch Ballet found himself trapped in the basement*, despite nobody knowing where the basement actually is.
**The process of removing Throat-Punch Ballet from the basement is on-going. The Tower Accountant has made the decision to mark him down as a casualty, but promises to consider reversing this if he is successfully salvaged.
Monday, January 23, 2017
Meet the Staff (Part 5)
Hello readers! With rumors of apocalyptic wrath from beings of questionable existence and Super Wizard assignments out of the way, things can get back to some semblance of normalcy again! Let's do another Meet the Staff. For this entry, we'll be discussing what many of the Super Wizards refer to as the Tower's very own League of Evil.
Frank Stein: Frank Stein is less part of the League of Evil and more...one of their biggest victims. As the Tower janitor, Frank has become a tragic reminder of the importance of reading your contract exceedingly carefully. This is especially true when the contract is drafted by our Tower Lawyer (see below).
As stated above, Frank is the Tower janitor, and has been for...a considerable amount of time. No one's really sure how long, and Frank has been somewhat less than willing to talk about it since about the time his lower jaw went missing. Sometime after losing yet another janitor to the various deadly challenges of Super Wizard life, the Tower accountant met with the Tower lawyer to find a solution. They decided that the next janitor they were to hire would have it in his contract that he consented being raised as a zombie if/when he died, and this would be repeated "as many times as necessary." At least the benefits seem to be pretty good, he never needs to worry about getting sick in his current state!
Robert Baron: Robert Baron is the Tower accountant, and rumor has it that he was a generous, good man at one point. Such is the sinister* nature of accounting that he has been twisted into the wretched, withered, evil thing that he is today. Refered by most simply as the Tower accountant, Robert Baron decides on the allocation of funds and negotiates payments between the council and the various forces that Super Wizards work with. He also keeps track of the casually quota. It's unknown who decides on the quota or what the repercussions are should it ever be exceeded.
He's also not very well liked.
*Sinister, but necessary.
The Tower Lawyer: The Tower Lawyer is a being so secretive that few outside the Council have ever actually seen their face. Many things about the Tower Lawyer are unknown, such as their gender, their appearance, or really...anything. There are plenty of rumors that circulate about them, everything from those that say they operate out of somewhere in the kitchen* to others that say they're not human, but fae**.
*Some that hold to this speculate that they're the source of the Kitchen being what it is.
**Plausible, as the Fae do make exceptionally good lawyers. As all are no doubt very aware, however, fae are forbidden to practice law in human society.
Frank Stein: Frank Stein is less part of the League of Evil and more...one of their biggest victims. As the Tower janitor, Frank has become a tragic reminder of the importance of reading your contract exceedingly carefully. This is especially true when the contract is drafted by our Tower Lawyer (see below).
As stated above, Frank is the Tower janitor, and has been for...a considerable amount of time. No one's really sure how long, and Frank has been somewhat less than willing to talk about it since about the time his lower jaw went missing. Sometime after losing yet another janitor to the various deadly challenges of Super Wizard life, the Tower accountant met with the Tower lawyer to find a solution. They decided that the next janitor they were to hire would have it in his contract that he consented being raised as a zombie if/when he died, and this would be repeated "as many times as necessary." At least the benefits seem to be pretty good, he never needs to worry about getting sick in his current state!
Robert Baron: Robert Baron is the Tower accountant, and rumor has it that he was a generous, good man at one point. Such is the sinister* nature of accounting that he has been twisted into the wretched, withered, evil thing that he is today. Refered by most simply as the Tower accountant, Robert Baron decides on the allocation of funds and negotiates payments between the council and the various forces that Super Wizards work with. He also keeps track of the casually quota. It's unknown who decides on the quota or what the repercussions are should it ever be exceeded.
He's also not very well liked.
*Sinister, but necessary.
The Tower Lawyer: The Tower Lawyer is a being so secretive that few outside the Council have ever actually seen their face. Many things about the Tower Lawyer are unknown, such as their gender, their appearance, or really...anything. There are plenty of rumors that circulate about them, everything from those that say they operate out of somewhere in the kitchen* to others that say they're not human, but fae**.
*Some that hold to this speculate that they're the source of the Kitchen being what it is.
**Plausible, as the Fae do make exceptionally good lawyers. As all are no doubt very aware, however, fae are forbidden to practice law in human society.
Thursday, January 19, 2017
Student Highlights Week 2: Throat-Punch Ballet
Name: Throat-Punch Ballet
Sex: Male
Race: Eighties-Spawn
Hometown: ???
Strengths: The Eighties
Weaknesses: Misuse/overuse of The Eighties, luck, Glamomancy
History: Throat-Punch Ballet is one of the students referred to as Eighties-Spawn. These students have come about during use of Montages, and due to the nature of said montages, it's impossible to know where they really came from. Sometimes they're dancers, other times they're backup singers, but in all cases they don't really know how to get home. We didn't really know what else to do with him, and the Happyshine police don't typically like to handle mysterious appearances, so we made him a student.
Notes: Throat-Punch Ballet has expressed considerable interest in Glamomancy, but has shown a lack of compatibility as extreme as Taco Lightning's incredible compatibility. I didn't see for myself, but I'm told that he had such a low compatibility rating that he made the genetic sampler reassemble itself after Taco Lighting caused it to explode. This is impressive in its own way, but we're not really sure what it means.
Glamomancy aside, Throat-Punch Ballet has a considerable amount of talent with The Eighties Super Wizard Discipline*. Such is his commitment to the discipline that he's gone so far as to wear sequinned clothing and keep his hair in a side-ponytail**.
*To be discussed next week.
**The council informed him*** that he didn't need to do this, but he has been undeterred.
***Forcefully
Use of The Eighties disciplines is not without risk and repercussion, however, and Throat-Punch Ballet has gotten in trouble because of this in the past. One of the more recent incidents involving his overuse of star wipes getting him trapped in a low-budget employee orientation video in the local Happyshine Combination Groceries, Pet store, and Sewage Treatment Plant*.
*For all your grocery and pet supply needs! Stay out of the back.
Last I heard, Throat-Punch Ballet had gotten himself trapped in the Tower Basement, which has made his retrieval difficult as no one knows where the Tower basement is. Still. I'm not sure if he's sent further communication regarding his situation because I only check my mail once a week, and it's not Friday yet. Perhaps we'll find out soon!
Sex: Male
Race: Eighties-Spawn
Hometown: ???
Strengths: The Eighties
Weaknesses: Misuse/overuse of The Eighties, luck, Glamomancy
History: Throat-Punch Ballet is one of the students referred to as Eighties-Spawn. These students have come about during use of Montages, and due to the nature of said montages, it's impossible to know where they really came from. Sometimes they're dancers, other times they're backup singers, but in all cases they don't really know how to get home. We didn't really know what else to do with him, and the Happyshine police don't typically like to handle mysterious appearances, so we made him a student.
Notes: Throat-Punch Ballet has expressed considerable interest in Glamomancy, but has shown a lack of compatibility as extreme as Taco Lightning's incredible compatibility. I didn't see for myself, but I'm told that he had such a low compatibility rating that he made the genetic sampler reassemble itself after Taco Lighting caused it to explode. This is impressive in its own way, but we're not really sure what it means.
Glamomancy aside, Throat-Punch Ballet has a considerable amount of talent with The Eighties Super Wizard Discipline*. Such is his commitment to the discipline that he's gone so far as to wear sequinned clothing and keep his hair in a side-ponytail**.
*To be discussed next week.
**The council informed him*** that he didn't need to do this, but he has been undeterred.
***Forcefully
Use of The Eighties disciplines is not without risk and repercussion, however, and Throat-Punch Ballet has gotten in trouble because of this in the past. One of the more recent incidents involving his overuse of star wipes getting him trapped in a low-budget employee orientation video in the local Happyshine Combination Groceries, Pet store, and Sewage Treatment Plant*.
*For all your grocery and pet supply needs! Stay out of the back.
Last I heard, Throat-Punch Ballet had gotten himself trapped in the Tower Basement, which has made his retrieval difficult as no one knows where the Tower basement is. Still. I'm not sure if he's sent further communication regarding his situation because I only check my mail once a week, and it's not Friday yet. Perhaps we'll find out soon!
Tuesday, January 17, 2017
Student Highlights Week 2: Taco Lightning
Name: Taco Lightning
Sex: Female
Race: Human
Hometown: Happyshine
Strengths: Glamomancy compatibility, Brainpower, kindness
Weaknesses: Timidness, Glamomancy in practice
History: Taco Lightning is one of the students to come from Happyshine. Her family has a long tradition of becoming Super Wizards, so it was a natural decision for her, and she's done rather well in her classes.
The whole Glamomancy thing as a whole is still somewhat controversial in the Tower. The Council has stressed the importance of Super Wizards branching out into the field, but has not elaborated much as to the reasons why. Taco Lightning is actually rather skilled in the Brainpower discipline, arguably one of our most promising students, but because of her compatibility with Glamomancy the Council has insisted that she switch her focus. This has not quite sat well with her for a number of reasons, not the least of which being the current lack of direction with Glamomancy as a whole.
It's not overly well-known, but Taco Lightning is Turbo Thunder's little sister.
Notes: Taco Lightning has been the most promising candidate for Glamomancy to date, causing the genetic sampler to explode in a cloud of sparkles and "zazz." That aside, she hasn't seemed to exhibit any of the usual characteristics we've come to expect from Glamomancy candidates. This isn't too out of the ordinary, however, considering how new the field is.
It should be noted that Taco Lightning has been taking classes from an unknown teacher as of late. The council is looking into what's going on with this, but she has appeared to have gone missing in the meantime.
Sex: Female
Race: Human
Hometown: Happyshine
Strengths: Glamomancy compatibility, Brainpower, kindness
Weaknesses: Timidness, Glamomancy in practice
History: Taco Lightning is one of the students to come from Happyshine. Her family has a long tradition of becoming Super Wizards, so it was a natural decision for her, and she's done rather well in her classes.
The whole Glamomancy thing as a whole is still somewhat controversial in the Tower. The Council has stressed the importance of Super Wizards branching out into the field, but has not elaborated much as to the reasons why. Taco Lightning is actually rather skilled in the Brainpower discipline, arguably one of our most promising students, but because of her compatibility with Glamomancy the Council has insisted that she switch her focus. This has not quite sat well with her for a number of reasons, not the least of which being the current lack of direction with Glamomancy as a whole.
It's not overly well-known, but Taco Lightning is Turbo Thunder's little sister.
Notes: Taco Lightning has been the most promising candidate for Glamomancy to date, causing the genetic sampler to explode in a cloud of sparkles and "zazz." That aside, she hasn't seemed to exhibit any of the usual characteristics we've come to expect from Glamomancy candidates. This isn't too out of the ordinary, however, considering how new the field is.
It should be noted that Taco Lightning has been taking classes from an unknown teacher as of late. The council is looking into what's going on with this, but she has appeared to have gone missing in the meantime.
Monday, January 16, 2017
Student Highlights Week 2: Ninja Bunny
Name: Ninja Bunny
Sex: Female
Race: Human-esque. Almost certainly.
Hometown: Dim Underchilly
Strengths: Rabbit Transmogrification, Math
Weaknesses: Being told to stop using Rabbit Transmogrification, attention span.
History: Ninja Bunny is one of the only Super Wizard students to come from Dim Underchilly (the other being Rodeo Nova, as previously mentioned). Her parents are cultists from the cult of the Screaming Bleeding Agony, but apparently decided she wasn't a great fit for the cult for "undisclosed reasons" and sent her to the Tower. It didn't seem like she'd take too well to Super Wizard education initially, until she was told about Rabbit Transmogrification. The Tower Psychologist predicts that it was around this time she jumped from a 1 to at least a 5 on the insanity scale.
Notes: Ninja Bunny has an unnaturally excessive level of skill in Rabbit Transmogrification, which is rivaled only by her equally unnaturally excessive desire to use Rabbit Transmogrification. You may recall the recent incident when classroom 2A had to be evacuated and closed for renovations. The reason this occurred was because Ninja Bunny turned everything in the classroom* into Rabbits. She was given detention but managed to transmogrify the Super Wizard in charge of detention. The council has decided that she probably learned her lesson and let her go***. According to the Tower Psychologist, Ninja Bunny rates at a 5 or a 6 on the insanity scale, so she's within acceptable bounds.
*Desks, chairs, students**, posters, etc.
**They're still trying to sort out the desk/chair/poster rabbits from the student rabbits. The accountant is unsure if he should count this towards the casualty quota, but for now he's decided to hold off.
***As none of the Elders have become rabbits (except for Elder Malcolm of course, who was already a rabbit), I assume Ninja Bunny was satisfied with this.
Ninja Bunny has a well-known rivalry of some sort with Rodeo Nova. While neither of them have really discussed it at any length, anyone who was there for the library incident knows about this. Rodeo Nova's antics with her hounds as of late seems to have exacerbated this problem somewhat.
The Tower Psychologist has been trying to determine if Ninja Bunny's constant use of Rabbit Transmogrification is rooted in some sort of sinister desire to transmogrify the entire world into rabbits, or if she's just easily amused and morally flexible. I'm told his research has been put on hold as he's been transmogrified into a rabbit.
Sex: Female
Race: Human-esque. Almost certainly.
Hometown: Dim Underchilly
Strengths: Rabbit Transmogrification, Math
Weaknesses: Being told to stop using Rabbit Transmogrification, attention span.
History: Ninja Bunny is one of the only Super Wizard students to come from Dim Underchilly (the other being Rodeo Nova, as previously mentioned). Her parents are cultists from the cult of the Screaming Bleeding Agony, but apparently decided she wasn't a great fit for the cult for "undisclosed reasons" and sent her to the Tower. It didn't seem like she'd take too well to Super Wizard education initially, until she was told about Rabbit Transmogrification. The Tower Psychologist predicts that it was around this time she jumped from a 1 to at least a 5 on the insanity scale.
Notes: Ninja Bunny has an unnaturally excessive level of skill in Rabbit Transmogrification, which is rivaled only by her equally unnaturally excessive desire to use Rabbit Transmogrification. You may recall the recent incident when classroom 2A had to be evacuated and closed for renovations. The reason this occurred was because Ninja Bunny turned everything in the classroom* into Rabbits. She was given detention but managed to transmogrify the Super Wizard in charge of detention. The council has decided that she probably learned her lesson and let her go***. According to the Tower Psychologist, Ninja Bunny rates at a 5 or a 6 on the insanity scale, so she's within acceptable bounds.
*Desks, chairs, students**, posters, etc.
**They're still trying to sort out the desk/chair/poster rabbits from the student rabbits. The accountant is unsure if he should count this towards the casualty quota, but for now he's decided to hold off.
***As none of the Elders have become rabbits (except for Elder Malcolm of course, who was already a rabbit), I assume Ninja Bunny was satisfied with this.
Ninja Bunny has a well-known rivalry of some sort with Rodeo Nova. While neither of them have really discussed it at any length, anyone who was there for the library incident knows about this. Rodeo Nova's antics with her hounds as of late seems to have exacerbated this problem somewhat.
The Tower Psychologist has been trying to determine if Ninja Bunny's constant use of Rabbit Transmogrification is rooted in some sort of sinister desire to transmogrify the entire world into rabbits, or if she's just easily amused and morally flexible. I'm told his research has been put on hold as he's been transmogrified into a rabbit.
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