Q&A With Lazer Gaiden (Part 1)

So I've received some questions from students regarding this blog.  With it being Friday, I figured that we'd take a bit of a break and cover some of these concerns as best I can, while crediting the student asking the question.

Are Elder Jack's classes canceled while he's recovering from his kitchen-related injuries?
-Wolf Knight

Elder Jack's contract requires that he make himself available to teach his classes even in the face of injury, dismemberment, or exposure to supernatural extra-dimensional horror.  So no, his classes will not be canceled.  They may just be more colorful temporarily.  Probably temporarily.

How long has Elder Fred been with the school? Is it true he was once a part of the... Ehm, west wing? (Realizing of course there has never once and never will be a west wing, please don't throw me in detention.)
-Space Slayer

I'm not surprised to see a question regarding Elder Fred so quickly, and I've heard this question asked fairly frequently.  While Elder Fred has never actually revealed his true age, rumors and historical texts suggest that he may have been one of the founders of the Super Wizard order.  He truly is the cornerstone of the Super Wizard Tower.

As for the west wing, I assume that this inquiry is regarding the locked door with the sign on it that says "WEST WING:  KEEP OUT!"  As I've received a number of questions regarding this as well, let me just clear this up, the West Wing is the part of the tower where we store the supplies of Crimson Bovine Power Beverage, and nothing more.  Any rumors of a deeper, darker secret are purely conjecture, and certainly nothing to do with Elder Fred.

For your own safety, please stay out of the West Wing.

My question is to Elder Bob:  After I punched it, the thing I punched began to get savagely angry with me. Should I punch it again in hopes of calming the now angry Grizzly Bear. (I forgot to mention that I punched Elder Bob's Grizzly Weapons).
-Lesser Evil

This is a question that you'll need to address to Elder Bob after class.

As an aside, congratulations in your recent enrollment into Rabies Training 101!

What is the purpose of the bottomless pit in the ladies bathroom?

-Rodeo Nova

While I haven't seen this myself for obvious reasons, from what I understand the hole was the result of a student misusing a shovel (Not the kind for digging).  There are plans to have that repaired but I'm not sure what the timetable is on that as we lack any digging implements in the tower and all the Happyshine contractors have had us blacklisted ever since the Kitchen renovations.

After enrolling in Rabies 101, is it normal to find myself frequently foaming at the mouth?
Follow-up question:  Is it also normal to be foaming from other places?
Follow-up-follow-up question:  Time is a factor.
-Raging Bull-Mouse

Looks like you've got a series of questions here, Raging Bull-Mouse.  Please allow me to answer them one by one.

1. Yes!  Foaming at the mouth is a side-effect that all users of rabies must endure.
2. No!  This is not normal and you should probably visit Doctor CoolRad at the infirmary.  It sounds like something that can probably be swiftly resolved with a high five (Assuming you're not foaming from the hand.)
3. This is not, actually, a question.  Perhaps next semester, you could enroll in Elder Steve's class "Black Magic and Sentence Structures." 

That's all for this week!  Thank you for your questions!  Enjoy your weekend, everyone!