It's time for every child of the Dark Undercold's favorite show*, Question Korner with Kiddie Killdeath! I'm Kiddie Killdeath, your lovable state-sponsored cartoon propaganda mascot!
*By law
Mister Killdeath, I've heard that some Super Wizards did some bad things right outside the Dark Undercold. Are they going to come here next?
-Bloody Massacre, 6
No need to worry, Bloody Massacre! The Super Wizards can't actually get into the Dark Undercold! You see, we've built a wall around our borders, and it's big and tall and keeps out undesirables like Super Wizards! And the best part is that we're going to get the Super Wizards to pay for it someday! Yaaaaaaaay!!!
Hi Mister Killdeath! Why do we call where we live the Dark Undercold if it's not dark or cold?
-Deathy McDeathdeath, 7
That's a very good question, Deathy! The answer is actually very long and complicated, but the short version is that we call it the Dark Undercold because it sounds cool!
Do you really believe that the Dark Undercold can perpetually sustain itself while also maintaining so many isolationist policies? The population is still growing, and some places are already reporting food sho-
-Shiny Bloodwave, 3
Sorry to cut your question short, Shiny, but a little surveillance birdy tells me that you're not the one who wrote this question! Don't worry! The Underpatrol will be dropping by any time now and I'm sure that by the time they leave, you won't have any questions ever again! Won't that be nice?!
Are all the Super Wizards bad?
-Donnie Homicide
As a general rule, yes! There is one named Elder Fred, however, who gets a pass!
What should we do if we ever meet a Super Wizard, Mister Killdeath?
-Hurricane of Todd, 4
Kill them, rend the flesh from their bones, throw what's left into an anonymous ditch and let the birds feast on their remains!
That's all the time we have for today, kids! Tune in next week, when I'll be showing you 1984 ways to make paper dolls and snowflakes from the bodies of your enemies!!!
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