Q&A With Lazer Gaiden (Part 8)

Hey everyone, it's time for Q&A!

Due to the kitchen being, well, the kitchen, where is the best place to find quality deli meats in Happyshine?
-Rodeo Nova

Hello Rodeo Nova!

Your best bet for quality deli meats is to try Delimancy.

I should clarify here, as this has caused some confusion in the past. Delimancy is not a school of magic (not that Super Wizards use, at least), but the name of a Deli in Happyshine. The Sand-witches there can hook you up with some of the best meat in Happyshine. Just don't ask where it comes from or how it comes to be. The Sand-witches don't share the secrets of their arts*, and we probably don't want to know their secrets anyway.
*The sand-witches are incredibly protective of their arts, lest they fall into the hands of competitors or health inspectors.

On the off-chance that the profane, unholy, and altogether unclean practice of delimancy makes you uncomfortable, you can also visit Dirty Ned's Meat Alternatives Deli and Hardware Store. Full disclosure though, their "meats" are made of dirt.

Dear Lazer Gaiden,
When did all of the towers dogs begin to sound like Elder George? More importantly, how did I not notice this until now?
The ever faithful,
Lesser Evil


Hello Lesser Evil.

I'm going to be completely honest here Lesser Evil, I'm not sure how you're messaging me, or why
your questions are coming on mysterious objects dripping with unquestionably disgusting substances of questionable sentience. I'm also not sure how you're aware of anything going on at the tower, since you haven't been here in some time.

Well, you don't seem quite aware of what's going on.  To the extent of my knowledge, only one Rodeo Nova's dogs sounds like Elder George.  I'm not sure how you'd miss th-

Wait a second, you're not exploring parallel universes, are you?  You should know that that's strictly against the rules in the handbook!  You're getting so much detention when you get back. 

Sir, I've noticed that your updates have been somewhat irregular as of late. Is there any reason for this? Is everything alright?
-Taco Lightning

Hello Taco Lightning.

Thank you for your concern, but everything is alright.  It's just a busy time of year, with the holidays and all that.  The good news is that the previous year was defeated, but not without some time scars.  They'll probably heal eventually, but if you see any tears in the fabric of reality while going about your business in the tower, please steer clear of them and report them to the Council as soon as possible.  Time scars need to be treated with time bandages.

Well readers, I believe it's time for us to wrap up this week's Q&A.  Representatives from Crimson Bovine have arrived to examine the substance that  Lesser Evil's question was coated in, and I don't want to be on the wrong side of their flavor maces.  See you Monday!