Student Highlights Week 1.5: Space Slayer

Hello students.  Before I get into the last of the student highlights, let me just officially announce that the "Crimson Bovine" incident from yesterday has been resolved.  Apparently, "Crimson Bovine" sent us the experimental Tropical Chaos flavor when we were supposed to get the Tropical Brain Freeze flavor.  While they have been unwilling to go into too much detail (trade secrets and all that), they have said that the symptoms experienced yesterday were caused by the highly experimental new 'Flavor Toxin.'  At low enough doses, the toxin is very safe.  In higher doses, however...well...mortal minds were not equipped to handle those levels of flavor.

"Crimson Bovine" has offered an official apology for the mix-up, along with a 4% off coupon for any "Crimson Bovine" products.  The Council has considered this fair compensation.

Name: Space Slayer

Sex: Female

Race: Space Prince

Hometown: Borington, The Forbidden Space Lagoon

Strengths: Strong potential candidate for Kung-Futhulhu, if she stops being distressed by the suggestion.  Space Slayer is also unusually resilient to kitchen duty which she receives frequently due to her unfortunate interest in forbidden places that do not exist.

Weaknesses: Honesty, tendency to stumble into places that are forbidden and/or do not exist, difficulty accepting complements (or really, any comments at all) regarding facial tentacles.

History: Space Slayer is our only resident student from The Forbidden Space Lagoon, a small town in the country of Borington.  Her parents wanted a better life for her, so they enrolled her into the Super Wizard tower*.  She passed the entrance exams and began her education at the tower.  Her parents, however, apparently never made it home.  Space Slayer's response to this was "They probably got lost or wandered outside the boundaries that govern reality.  It happens, they'll probably turn up in some timeline, hopefully this one."

*This was later revealed to be due to a paperwork mix-up.  Space Slayers parents aren't actually literate, and the postal workers of the world generally just assume letters that consist of a series of scribbles are for us**.

**They're usually correct.

Notes: Space Princes aren't actually royalty (Space Slayer's parents are actually farmers.).  It's said that the town was founded by a Super Wizard in their retirement, although there's no official records that make mention to this.  Either way, all residents of The Forbidden Space Lagoon call themselves Space Princes.

The Council has recommended keeping Space Slayer and Lesser Evil apart.  With Lesser Evil's strong tendency to get lost, and Space Slayer's equally strong tendency to end up in forbidden places that do not exist, the Council is concerned about their ability to contain the fallout such a pairing would cause.

It should be noted that the town of The Forbidden Space Lagoon no longer exists.  The council is unsure where it went, and this has caused some concern as the difficulty of moving entire towns is well documented (or was, before Rodeo Nova's book crusade.)  Most people in Borington seem confused when questioned about the town.  The residents have also vanished, leaving Space Slayer as the only remaining resident of The Forbidden Space Lagoon.  This has not seemed to phase her in any capacity.